Dear Bumble and Bumble Curl Conscious Conditioner,
I would like to take a moment to thank you for existing. You have become my one indispensible beauty aid, and I simply cannot bear to imagine my head of curls without you. I miss you between washes. Most days, when I have not used you, I wear a ponytail. Whether it is your actual talent, or my sheer, unwavering belief in your abilities to smooth frizz and provide shine without weighing my sometimes fine tresses down, I hold you in the highest regard and sing your praises to all who will listen. Whenever I get a compliment on my hair, I always give you the credit. I almost always have to check my luggage because of you, though one time I forgot and you were discovered in my carry on. I feared for the worst! Thankfully, the TSA officer was also a curly-haired conditioner fanatic. She let me through without trouble and a wink of solidarity. Though, I often wish you were not quite so expensive, I find that when compared to the emotional costs of looking like a young Tito Jackson (no offense to Mr. Jackson), you are more than worth it.
Also, thank you for being available in giant size.
Sincerely, and most enthusiastically yours,